Family problems and their impact on children
By:
Adnan bin Salman Ad-Duraiwisy
Adnan bin Salman Al -dariish
Family problems are very natural, and there are no families in the universe that do not suffer from family problems and marriage disputes, so it is not possible to live in normal and happy life, but there are some differences between family members, especially between partners, and the reason for this is that every individual in this world has certain personalities and traits that cannot be compatible with something else.
Problems in the family are very normal matters. There is no household in the universe that does not experience family problems and husband and wife disputes. It is impossible for someone to always live in a normal and happy life, but there will definitely be some disputes between family members, especially between husband and wife. Because from this refers to the factor that every person in this world must have certain characters and character, which may not be in harmony with the character of others in a matter.
But marital and family differences Become excessive if the Husband is rejected by the wife or vice verta, or the immoral violence and behavior, the continuous screen, and the atmosphere full of tension, especially in front of the child in a private room, and then start problems, think that the children will not hear them or watch them, but the opposite always happens, so he starts crying, tantrum Anxiety, and he suffered several disturbances if this problem survived in front of his eyes.
However, husband and wife disputes and households become the boundary if the husband becomes away from his wife or vice versa, or violence and attitudes that do not reflect commendable morals, screams and screams always occur, and the atmosphere of the household is full of tension, especially if it happens in front of children.
Some families put their children in a special room, then they begin to discuss their problems, with the suspicion that children cannot hear or watch them. However, what always happens is the opposite. The child will be influenced by the dispute, because he still has a gentle heart and does not understand the nature of the dispute that occurs between his parents, so he will start crying, fear, tense, and experience some mental shocks if these problems continue in front of his eyes.
Unfortunately, this quarrel has a severe negative impact on most children, and this effect can expand and continue with children in their future lives, and among these effects:
• Episode of tension and anxiety: When children appear in the dialectical environment surrounded by problems between parents, there is a possibility that he can develop emotional disorders, and many questions begin to manipulate the child’s mind about whether his parents love him, or if they are about to be separated, and what are their fate?
• Postponement of School Performance: Emotional tension suffered by children as a result of problems between their parents, making children distorted as a result of their thinking about the consequences of problems at home.
However, what is unfortunate is that these disputes have a pretty severe negative influence on the majority of children. In fact, sometimes the influence continues and is carried away by children in their future lives. Among these influences are:
- Disruption and fear of anxiety
When a child grows in an environment full of feuds and is surrounded by problems between parents, then the possibility of he will be exposed to emotional disorders. There will be many questions that will play the minds of children about whether their parents love him, what if they are both divorced, and how they will fate, and so on.
Emotional disorders experienced by children due to problems between their parents will cause them to not be able to focus, because they will think about the consequences that might have been caused by problems that occur at home.
Psychological Problems: When general conflicts at home, both between partners, between parents and children, or a mixture of two types, children often develop psychological problems.
• Permanent effects: children who created the problems of repeated parents tend to be affected in adulthood, and they are more at risk of experiencing depression, drug and alcohol abuse, and to carry out anti -community behavior, with the risk of failure in personal relationships and professional life even after adolescents.
• Learn about bad friends: If the conflict between parents continues for a long time, children may be in a hurry to leave home for a long time, and know bad friends.
When disputes often occur at home, both between husband and wife, parents and children, or both, often children will often be exposed to mental disorders.
- Permanent negative influence
Children who grow among the problems of both parents repeatedly are likely to be affected until the age of baligh, and is more easily exposed to depression, drug consumption and alcohol, and behaviors that oppose norms in society. In addition, they will be threatened with failure in personal relationships and work life until after passing through adolescence.
- Hang out with bad friends
When disputes between parents continue for a long time, often children will be encouraged to leave home for a long time and get acquainted with bad friends.
• Emotional failure: where children have shaped wrong ideas about marriage and love, and he may fully reject the idea of marriage, and this will affect his emotional life, and make him feel inferior, because the psychological contract that is formed by him on this topic.
Family failure: In the case of the child married, he will not have previous experience about how to shape and create a healthy and healthy family and problem free, and he can practice the same false actions that he can learn from his family in his family and lead them to destruction.
Because children have built wrong thoughts about marriage and love, it could be that he becomes fully rejecting thoughts about marriage. This will certainly affect his emotional life, and make him feel like he has a shortage due to the complexity of the emotions that are formed in him about this case.
When the child is married, he may not have experience about how to build and start a normal, healthy, and free household from problems. It could even be that he will do the same wrong behaviors that he has learned from his family, then leads his household to destruction.
These problems have a reason that parents must pay attention to, stay away from, and try to treat it before they get worse and increase; Including:
• Marriage silence, maybe because of the many practical burdens and finances of the husband and the requirements of politeness, or from the wife because they do not accept it.
• Weaknesses of life partners strengthen. Everyone has weaknesses and positives, whatever it is, so it’s wrong to focus on his mistakes and forget his good deeds.
• Third party disturbance in negative marriage life; Like parents, relatives, or friends, it is the cause of the emergence of problems between couples.
Technology and electronic devices, although there are positive life in general, it has a negative effect on marital life.
I ask the great God to improve ourselves, our husbands and descendants, and bring us out with good creation and good deeds, and may God bless our master Muhammad.
These problems certainly have a reason that both parents need to be observed and avoided, and they must try to eradicate it before this problem increases and continues to grow. Among these problems are:
- There is no communication between husband and wife
This could be caused by the many burdens of the husband on work, finance, and other life demands, or from the wife who was reluctant to accept her husband.
- Enlarged -Raising Life partner disgrace
Everyone must have losses and advantages, anyone who exists. Therefore, it is a mistake if someone only focuses on the shortcomings of others and forgets their superiority.
- Third party negative interference in domestic life, such as from both parents, relatives, or friends, so that this is the cause of problems between husband and wife.
- Technology and electronic devices
Although this has many benefits in life in general, it also has negative influences in married life.
I ask the highest ta’ala to improve ourselves, our partners, and our descendants, and to improve us with good morals and good deeds. Hopefully Greetings and Greetings are always in the Prophet Muhammad Sallallaahu Alaihi wa Sallam.
Source:
Family and its impact on children
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